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Maryam Obeyd

Social Justice Engagement and Solidarity

In a time where tensions are inescapable, I was interviewed by Madelyn Gee at Reckon News regarding social justice engagement. Below is Madelyn's article:


"People paying attention to the Israel-Hamas war in the last nearly two weeks have been feeling heightened anxiety witnessing a sea of traumatic graphics, sounds and words, including images of dead children and Palestinians sharing their last words on social media.Both Muslim and Jewish communities are also currently grappling with heightened fear and anxiety, with Palestinians and Muslims fearing a resurgence of post-9/11 Islamophobia after a 6-year old Palestinian boy was murdered in a hate crime and Jewish communities remaining apprehensive due to past experiences of being targeted by extremist threats.


Right now “most people probably are looking at too many very graphic and violent images that are disturbing them, because they’re human beings,” Dr. Gail Saltz, Clinical Associate Professor of Psychiatry at the NY Presbyterian Hospital Weill-Cornell School of Medicine and host of the “How Can I Help?” Podcast, said.

At the same time, Palestinians under siege in Gaza and activists are imploring people to not look away.

“If you’re worried about being performative, this is what Palestinians are directly asking us to do. They’re asking us to keep talking about what’s happening to their people and pressuring our government to stop funding the violence,” scholar-activist and sociologist Bianca Mabute-Louie said in a viral Instagram post on Oct. 16. Mabute-Louie is one of many activists pleading with folks on social media to stay engaged.

“I know it’s a lot right now but please fight the urge to disengage or delude yourself into thinking you can sit this one out,” wrote author and activist Michelle MiJung Kim in an Instagram post on Oct. 16. " Yes, take a break, but the situation in Gaza is DIRE and EVERYONE needs to be doing something to stop an entire population from being eradicated from a deliberate genocidal military attack.”


One piece of the puzzle that hasn’t been addressed: What does it mean for people to see such horrors? How can we mourn and grieve after seeing so much death?


“Collective grief needs witness, a space to name what is happening clearly and without gaslighting,” said artist and end of life doula Iele Paloumpis. “Otherwise, grief will become shame and that is more difficult to collectively heal. In this moment of urgency, it will be impossible for us to grieve fully, that is an unrealistic expectation.”


By the time of this article’s publication, at least 4,200 people have been killed in the Gaza Strip since last Saturday, according to the United Nations, in retaliation to the 1,400 Israelis killed and nearly 200 kidnapped by Islamic militant group Hamas on Oct. 7. The violence is expected to continue escalating in the coming week as Israel readies troops for a ground attack.


So what CAN you do?


Staying informed and keeping tabs on what’s going on in the coming weeks won’t be easy, so Reckon spoke to four therapists on how to cope and bear witness during violent times. Here’s what they said:


1. Make sure you get enough sleep and maintain your personal hygiene.

When you do not get enough sleep, it can impact your behavior, brain functionality and judgment, according to a 2015 study. The CDC recommendsseven or more hours per night of sleep. Be sure to also turn off your phone at least thirty minutes beforehand, according to the National Sleep Foundation.

Shower at the very least a couple of times a week and brush your teeth twice a day.

“Continue to prioritize your well-being by nourishing your body with healthy foods, staying hydrated, getting adequate sleep, and exercising. If necessary and feasible, don’t hesitate to take time off from work or school to address these fundamental needs,” clinical psychologist Dr. Amanda Malak said.


2. If you can, turn towards your spirituality and higher power.

A 2022 study found that those that turn to “spiritual practices were found to enhance resilience and positive coping among individuals and may act as protective factors to weaken the psychological effects of such catastrophes.”

“Keeping my prayers all the time…Brings to me calmness and a sense of sanity,” psychologist and Graduate Theological Union adjunct professor Dr. Iman Farajallah said.

If you don’t have a spiritual connection, practicing meditation and staying mindful of how you feel physically, mentally and emotionally can help.


3. Reach out to your friends and support systems

Having a support system around you, especially during hard times, can help you process and provide the needed encouragement to keep going.

A 2017 study found that “social support reduces the adverse effects of mental stress in 5 ways: emotional attention, helping, information, assessment of others’ feedback about the quality of performance, and sociability.”


4. Know that it is healthy to grieve and that feeling scared or distressed is normal.

Ignoring or pushing your grief down can potentially make you feel worse, so it’s best to let your emotions flow. Feelings like depression, sadness or anxiety during times of war can also be normal to feel, according to a 2006 study.

“Process these emotions with friends and family, seek support from your community (e.g., spiritual groups), participate in vigils or protests, journal your thoughts, and let your emotions move through your body,” Dr. Malak said.


5. Take deep breaths

A 2020 study found that mindful breathing helped decrease burnout, anxiety, cynicism, and emotional exhaustion. Focus on your breath flowing through your body. If your mind wanders, recenter yourself.

“Taking breaks, and engaging in the practice of diaphragmatic breathing can help us re-regulate our nervous system as it will activate our body’s relaxation response and lower our stress response,” licensed graduate professional counselor Heba Youssef said.


6. Use mantras to reduce stress

A mantra, “originally in Hinduism and Buddhism, is a word or sound repeated to aid concentration in meditation.” Wellness apps such as Insight Timer have full catalogs of audios and videos to help you add mantras to your daily practice.

They help “reduce the isolation, hopelessness or fear” that can potentially be felt by those who doom scroll, according to licensed marriage and family therapist Maryam Obeyd.

Some examples include repeating words like “peace” or “calm.” You can also use full phrases like “I feel the fear and persist.”


7. For those that have family in Gaza: Find ways to build resilience

Know that you are their voice to talk about their experiences. However, be sure to take care of your own voice as well. Build up your resilience and stay strong, because this situation can be a long road, Dr. Farajallah said.

At the end of the day, “eat well, sleep well, get up on your feet and then let your humanity rise,” Dr. Farajallah said. If you need more support during this time, be sure to reach out to a trusted medical professional.


8. Take action

People are finding community in speaking up and taking action to demand a ceasefire. A 2020 systematic review found studies that suggest “collective actions may reduce depression and suicide, possibly due to a collective cathartic experience and greater social cohesion within subpopulations.”

Yesterday, more than 400 protestors with organizations IfNotNow and Jewish Voice for Peace were detained on Capitol Hill while calling for a ceasefire in Gaza. The action was the largest Jewish protest in solidarity with Palestinians in U.S. history.

“For me, the only way I have gotten through this week is by taking action with others,” said comedic performer and writer Morgan Bassichis said in an Instagram Live conversation with activist and writer Adrienne Maree Brown on October 16. “There is no other practice…There is getting with people who say ‘What can we do now to prevent more suffering’…Action is the only antidote to despair.”



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